Author Topic: Moods  (Read 6415 times)

Shoop Da Whoop

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Moods
« on: August 24, 2008, 05:42:43 PM »
I was reluctant to post this, but I've been here long enough to realize that you guys are the last people to give me shit. This past summer I fell into another depression and up until yesterday I have been able to cope with it. What caused me to be pushed over the edge is my commitment to water polo. I'm on elite water polo team in Santa Cruz, and I'm almost sure that it's causing me to become overwhelmed and stressed out. Yesterday I had an anxiety attack, I broke down and cried for hours with my body constantly tense and shaking. After this I tried to figure out what was causing this. As much as I don't want to admit it, I think that my commitment to water polo is slowly breaking me down and if I continue with it I will be miserable for the next couple months. Right now, my anxiety is so bad that I can't sleep or go throughout my day without being in a blue mood.

The reason why I posted this is because I am having trouble making up my mind. I definately do want to quit the team and start talking to a therapist. The only thing that is keeping me from doing this is my fear of becoming a pussy or a bitch for quiting the team. I know that this fear is irrational but I CANNOT get past it. This decision is racking my brain and right now I'm just looking for some outside input on the situation.

I would also appreciate it if someone would share some ideas on how to deal with depression and anxiety.




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Re: Moods
« Reply #1 on: August 24, 2008, 06:17:48 PM »
I think your teammates would hopefully respect your decision, as the moods/anxiety issues can and probably will affect how you play the game, hurting the team more or less. If they can't accept the fact that this is having a serious affect on you, then you definitely don't need them in your life. That's how I run mine, at least. If people don't support me, or disrespect me because of decisions I have made, bam that's that.

I can't say I've personally experienced what you're going through, but that's my 2 pence
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OmegaOmni

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Re: Moods
« Reply #2 on: August 24, 2008, 07:29:50 PM »
It probably is best if you do seek professonal help because if you don't sooner or later it will start to greatly effect your life.

I know this because I have been depressed for the last half a year for a few reasons and have almost sought professional help.  The only reason I haven't is because I can not afford it.

Shoop Da Whoop

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Re: Moods
« Reply #3 on: August 24, 2008, 09:19:34 PM »
I've been gathering the opinions of people close to me and I've been trying to talk to as many people as I can about it. the general concensus is that if water polo is too stressful, I should quit. The problem for me is now the anxiety that I am going to have before and when I tell my water polo coach and team that I am quitting.

TimJing

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Re: Moods
« Reply #4 on: August 24, 2008, 09:41:15 PM »
depression, as i'm finding out, is a very tough thing to deal with. very, very tough.

you're definitely making a step in the right direction by posting about it here. even though we're just some guys (and a few girls!) online we can definitely offer advice.

having a therapist would presumably help, i can't say for sure though.

the only solid advice i can give you is to try and pick up another sport, or even hobby, that would be less exhaustive than water polo. try tennis... get on a court with a buddy and just hit some balls back and forth. practically endless enjoyment.

oh, and the last thing you should be worrying about is the 'backlash' you'd theoretically get from your coach/team. I quit marching band this year due to not wanting the stress of 20+ hours a week of practice for 4 months, few other reasons... i went to my band director and flat out told him, i don't want to do marching band this year. i gave him my reasons and was very level with him.

i'm missed in marching band, but when my friends/peers ask me why i'm not doing it, i give them an honest answer- i just plain don't want to anymore. and none of them give me any lip for it. the best thing you can do is be honest about it, and if your peers/coach happen to dislike you for your own decision, just avoid them. they'll get over it, without a doubt.
« Last Edit: August 24, 2008, 09:44:58 PM by TimJing »

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Jupi

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Re: Moods
« Reply #5 on: August 24, 2008, 10:05:53 PM »


oh, and the last thing you should be worrying about is the 'backlash' you'd theoretically get from your coach/team. I quit marching band this year due to not wanting the stress of 20+ hours a week of practice for 4 months, few other reasons... i went to my band director and flat out told him, i don't want to do marching band this year. i gave him my reasons and was very level with him.

i'm missed in marching band, but when my friends/peers ask me why i'm not doing it, i give them an honest answer- i just plain don't want to anymore. and none of them give me any lip for it. the best thing you can do is be honest about it, and if your peers/coach happen to dislike you for your own decision, just avoid them. they'll get over it, without a doubt.

This.

It's perfectly natural to worry about what your friends/teammates are going to think if/when you quit that team.  Hell, it's part of the reason I haven't given up my position as treasurer in my school's anime/video game club.  (That, and there is literally no one else in the club that can take my position.  Nobody that is interested has the qualifications.  Kinda disturbing.)  That club has done almost nothing for me but cause stress in my life that I don't need.

But when some people heard that I might be vacating my position, nobody got upset.  They just told me that if I did in fact leave, they'd miss me, and they'd do their best to replace me.  The world didn't end. 

If your coach is any sort of a decent person, they'll understand why you'd be quitting the team.  Seriously, your well-being is far, FAR more important than being on that team. 

Please do try and talk to a professional.  :/  I've lost a few friends due to either my own issues or the fact that they've changed so much due to their own.  The sooner you can talk to someone that really knows what they're talking about, the better.

You're not a pussy, or a little bitch for doing these things.  You're just someone that wants to actually live through life, and not just suffer.  Life sucks sometimes, it's true.  But there's people that can help.  <3

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annon

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Re: Moods
« Reply #6 on: August 24, 2008, 10:44:55 PM »
I have friends and antidepressants to deal with mine, as well as plenty of other distractions. Of course, this comes with a lot of free time, which I'm guessing water polo isn't giving you.

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Bobbias

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Re: Moods
« Reply #7 on: August 25, 2008, 03:02:32 AM »
I've never really had any sort of commitment like that, but I have been depressed before. I know it's a hard thing to deal with, but honestly, you need to do something. If you force yourself to finally talk to your coach, you'll feel a lot better when it's over with.

The feeling of knowing that you can finally beat your depression, and move on with life is amazing.
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Spectere

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Re: Moods
« Reply #8 on: August 26, 2008, 03:51:50 AM »
There's nothing I can add that hasn't already been said.  Basically, I, uh, agree.

The first thing I'd do is to just quit the team.  I doubt anyone would consider you a pussy for trying to make your own life more manageable and less stressful.  I'm sure there'd be players that wished you'd stayed on, but honestly, if they can't understand that a healthy life is more important than a sports team then fuck 'em, they're not even worth listening to.

When I started high school I tended to get stressed out and depressed because I was worried about what people thought of me.  About half-way through my sophomore year of high school I just stopped caring altogether and just went along with it, did my own thing and everything did a complete 180.  I felt better, did better at school, and had a more positive outlook on life.

I'm not saying to completely ignore what people are saying, of course, but you have to realize that you shouldn't take everything said about you seriously.  You're going to take a lot of shit throughout your life and if you let yourself get upset or angry about it things aren't going to be pleasant.
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Bobbias

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Re: Moods
« Reply #9 on: August 26, 2008, 06:20:50 PM »
Yeah, my way of dealing with stress is not to care, but that has to be applied intelligently, otherwise you'll end up fucking things up for yourself.
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MortifiedocAlot

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Re: Moods
« Reply #10 on: August 27, 2008, 02:01:08 AM »
I guess I'm voting for you quieting the team, a mental break down like you had is nothing to take likely. Also don't let people tell you you're taking the easy way out, it's not like your dropping out of school.


Shoop Da Whoop

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Re: Moods
« Reply #11 on: August 29, 2008, 09:11:05 PM »
So I think I'm going to just bite my lip and play polo. Its kinda lame that the entire time I'm at practice I'm miserable. On the other hand, I am getting the best workout for my body that is possible. The fucking Olympic statue dude that's all ripped and cut was modeled after a water polo player. I'm not saying I'm going to look like that, but I am lookin' pretty sexy with my almost 6 pack. I think the only reason that I am playing water polo now at this point is for a workout. The lucky thing is, I can just practice with the team and not play in games at all, which is totally fucking sick. alright, Im really baked, sorry for the mish-mash of thoughts. Self medication FTW

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Re: Moods
« Reply #12 on: August 30, 2008, 01:33:44 AM »
The lucky thing is, I can just practice with the team and not play in games at all, which is totally fucking sick.

That would probably be your best bet.  You still get the exercise, you still get to chill with your teammates, you still get to go to the games, but you shouldn't have to worry quite about it as much.

Just be mindful of your health, m'kay?  And remember, if you need anything we'll always be here. :)
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